I think I'll spend some time replying to the tags first.

Vicks: I don't see how going to Sentosa without you people makes me a traitor. I think the island is big enough for several groups of friends. Well, if you can, organise one proper outing soon lah! I bumped into Jeremy today, and he was asking me where to go. Are we still going ice-skating?

Oh yeah, about me being a casanova, I hope you do realise that you're one of the girls linked to me ......... (you still remember the time when I said you'd be the last girl on earth I'd want to be linked to, and then I realised that there were plenty other ppl I'd rather NOT be linked to and then took back my words? haha)

Kevin: Well, I heard you did well anyway. Arts is rather slack too.

Quek: Poh Chong? Where did you see him?? Hmm, I wonder if he'll ever, umm.... mature. Anyway, the reviews for Chicken Little seem rather bad. I think we should catch something else. Sigh, when will King Kong come out?

Benita: Can we not do work everytime we meet? I'm finding the Bugis area rather boring.... Let's go shopping! hahaha...

***

Well, like I said above, I bumped into Jeremy today. He was wearing his dorky specs again! And his younger brother, who happens to be about a head taller than Jeremy, was with him. Oh, but don't worry, Jeremy, he doesn't seem to have your amazing bed-moss like hair.

I really wonder whether I over-analyse too much. I wonder whether the things I worry about are worth worrying for. Most of the time they aren't. And after a long period of tension and anxiety, I sometimes stop and think, what exactly am I anxious over? And I realise that a lot of times, they happen to be vague stuff not worth my time. Or at others, they happen to be small little things I extrapolate from, link back to past events, connect, cross over, piece together, and finally emerge with some overblown scenario. But sometimes, these scenarios happen to be true, and so I never know when I'll hit gold. sigh...

Maybe I really do need to go away for a while. I hope my NS doesn't start too early next year. Because I would like to revisit Switzerland after the 'A's. Or perhaps lounge about in Paris (hopefully the rioters will have been appeased). Or maybe London. Maybe this time it won't seem so gloomy and bleak...

HarbourFront

Well, will wonders never cease! I just came back from a meeting with my church friends to discuss this Saturday's outing to Sentosa. We were at HarbourFront, and when leaving on the train I bumped into Min Ling and Alicia, my first-three-months classmates. Goodness, I haven't seen them for months. I think the last time I saw them was in June, when I bumped into them at Kovan. That was in another time and another place for me, the beginning of a long painful period that is past. But oh, seeing them now again was such a pleasant surprise. It brings back all those memories in SR. Slow, lazy days spent lounging about in the aquarium, or in Heartland Mall. Those are my strongest impressions of SR. Everything seemed slow and slack there. Maybe it was just the first three months period, or maybe it was the place itself. I dunno.

Well, those were more carefree times. It's really odd for me, because the first three months were like a different dimension for me. For one, I was in another school, for the first time away from my beloved environment of the Saints. (okay, maybe not that beloved...) But the more curious thing was that I was in the Science faculty, doing bio, chem, maths. HAHAHA, such a joke. I mean, what is maths to me now? Bio? Chem? Such abstract concepts... (knowing full well they are far from abstract. Lit is definitely more abstract) I have abandoned the scientific world to embrace the nuances of poetic beauty and the political machinations of a bygone era...

They seemed more worn down by cares, especially Alicia. Maybe it's only natural. It's been nearly a year, and from the little I know life hasn't exactly been smooth-sailing for her. But, oh, how people have changed! Remember Daniel Sim, Quek? Well, he's in SR, and apparently he's much more open now. He's even been linked to a girl in his class lah! hahaha...

Well, it was good, seeing them. Looking forward to our upcoming gathering. :)

As I walked around HarbourFront, and as I left it, it slowly dawned upon me that never again would I walk in it wearing my school uniform. There was this sense of nostalgia and sadness. I'll never, or hardly ever see people there anymore, walking around in that striking white-blue-tie outfit. I'll miss the place. How many times have we strolled through the centre, sat in pastamania chitchatting, or ate in the foodcourt? I'll miss sitting in Wang Jiao with Benita, eating XXL Chicken in Shi Lin with Bryan, Vicks, Dai Wei, Jeremy. Licking Hip Hop Jelly outside Cheers, tasting pizza at New York Pizza. Studying in Banquet. hai.........

Here's to a wonderful year in Potong Pasir! hahahaha.......... Come to think of it, it will be like a homecoming for me. I've spent the greater part of my life studying in Potong Pasir.

Writing can be a cathartic experience, but even that has its limits. This blog is too public for some things, and not all inner feelings can be expressed in words. But the Spirit Himself intercedes for us with groans too deep for words.

My keyboard is acting up again, so when I hit the "1" key it performs the function of the "enter" key as well. Sigh.... I wonder when my father is going to get that new laptop. I suppose I should give thanks for the times it works normally. Sometimes people need things to go wrong to wake them up. In fact, that happens all too often doesn't it?

I've actually done constructive stuff so far. My two History essays are almost complete. I suppose this remark here would make some people hit the roof. But, oh well...

Liz: We're using Economist for starters. But there's something wrong with the brazil page. Keeps loading blank pages for me...

Vicks: oh well, I suppose the plantations would have some problems. I think I saw some article on Human Rights Watch on abusive treatment of street youths in Rio de Janeiro.

I'm dreaming of a white Christmas...

Brazil. Why Brazil? The MUN country listings are out, and we got Brazil. I mean, come on, I know nuts about Brazil except that it possesses the Amazon rainforest which is under threat, meaning our environment committee will have stuff to talk about there, and that it produces rather good soccer stars regularly. The last item doesn't concern me at all. What kind of human rights issues would Brazil face? Ah well, looks like I've got tons of research to do in the long run. I wonder what the Brazilian accent sounds like...

Our school is sending in two delegations this year. The second team is representing South Africa. Why are we getting all these wierd countries that appear in the news only because of soccer and apartheid? Ok, S. Africa would be interesting in terms of human rights. But Brazil...? I dunno...

It's getting so cold and rainy these days. It's been raining non-stop this morning. The weather is perfect for staying at home and sleeping. It's during times like these when I like to imagine myself snuggling up in bed with a huge comforter around me, pillows large and small piled high on the bed, and a cup of hot cocoa by the bedside. The glow of the firelight adds soft homely touches to my room, and I enjoy hearing the sound of the crackling fire. A large fur rug is stretched out across the floor before my bed. Outside, the snow is gently falling, adorning the evergreens in white. I hear the church bells toll in the distance, while the angelic voices of a choir carolling waft me to sleep. My book lies half-read on the bed.



Where the treetops glisten, and children listen to hear sleighbells in the snow...

Ok, this whole colour scheme thing is getting out of hand. Everyone stop talking about their respective colours now! We shall all just be known by our proper names.

Thanks Musa for reminding me about the MUN. We met up last Wednesday to discuss which countries we were going to be and most of us picked Germany, so that's our first choice. But since there are other schools taking part, our choice might clash with theirs. So our second choice is Brazil (don't ask me why. I didn't vote for that. so wierd lah), and our third choice is France. I'm on the Human Rights Committee, which should be interesting, considering Germany's past. But the teachers have instructed us to move beyond WWII if we get Germany.

So, that's that for MUN so far. This week I hope to do some constructive stuff by at least starting on my History homework. And considering how they are only two essays, I should be able to finish both soon. On Saturday after cell I happened to bump into Mr Yoong who smiled and asked if I'd done his assignments. And I hadn't of course, but I'd actually planned to do one the night before. Unfortunately the computer distracted me. And he said just make sure I finish them before school starts. So there you have it. One of those wierd moments that happen when your history teacher happens to be in the same church as you. I don't want to imagine what would happen if the other History teacher was in my church too.

I looked up my dictionary last night and found out the meaning of stalls and balconies and circles and galleries. For more information, please call sistic.

My cell can't do surprise birthdays...

So, today was my cell leader's birthday, and instead of keeping it a surprise some people messaged him to say they were going to be late or won't be able to come, etc.... And my leader kindly replied things like, "Oh, ok, I think you should tell Anna and Jayce, since they're the one's planning my surprise birthday party" or "um, I don't think I'm supposed to know about this..." haha, typical Chris. He was good enough to feign tears as we "surprised" him later on....

Surprise parties. Such delightful things.

Then afterwards I went to the newly refurbished Popular HQ at Bras Basah. It now looks like some poor Borders/Kinokuniya wannabe. I read in the news they were trying to muscle into the big bookstore market, but I think their effort wasn't enough. It's still not big enough. But the decor is much better, compared to the past. I still think they should cut down on the whole assessment books section.

Then after going round and round browsing for things, little miss red lost her $5 voucher. ....
Lost, or got it stolen. It doesn't matter. I shouldn't say too much here, haha. Just let it go. And try to see what can be learnt from this incident. Just because I'm a debater doesn't mean everything I say is a nicely packaged bundle of twisted facts. So, accept it and get on with life, haha.

Oh goodness, I've never eaten so much naan in my life. We went to this Indian restaurant to treat Chris, and now my fingers still smell of naan and spices. And then there was this homemade cheese cake by Anna and Jayce, which was really strong, but good. Ugh, I felt so bloated. And then later beni sat there eating cheese cake again. ugh... oh, but I must say the blueberry cheese cake was quite nice. Maybe next time I'll buy a slice for myself and down it with iced tea. They go quite well together.

I wanna go shop. or sleep. or read.

Everytime when I finish some monumental task, like the exams, the words, "It is accomplished/finished" pop into my head. They are, of course, some of the last words Jesus said while on the cross. Today is one of those days again. That scourge, that...that...plague, that ministry intiative gone horribly wrong, is over. PW is finished. So be it.

As much as I detest the subject, I may actually miss my PW group. Of course, we'll all still be together. But I quite liked those times we just sat around chit chatting about things completely unrelated to PW with the laptop in front of us, haha. When I look back to March, it amazes how far our class has come. I remember standing around during the orientation, wondering at the wierd people around me (That impression hasn't changed much though). Well, for better or for worse, we made it this far, and from what I've seen, there are still bright spots around me.

I have to make a clarification here. I realise now that when I put up my Christmas "gift list", many people assumed I was deciding on what to get for others. That is a misconception. At the risk of sounding terribly selfish, I must say here that the gift list is meant for myself. So I will now change its name to my "wish list". And who doesn't have a wish list?

Oh yes, CIP. I forgot to blog about it. I was doing CIP with Jeremy and Vicks last Saturday. It was quite fun, walking to and fro trying to find a good spot. We eventually found one at the Capitol Building opposite St. Andrew's Cathedral. Jeremy is officially an aunty killer. He was wearing these pair of thick-rimmed black glasses that made him look like the dorkiest, cute little schoolboy ever. As though he doesn't look like a little schoolboy enough normally. Well, apparently that look went down well with the aunties.

Liz: yeah, of course Braun Buffel sounds classier. It's Braun Buffel after all... I want it! And, what's wrong with Fossil? I never knew it was a wannabe brand...

KH: Yup, I won't forget. I wonder what we should watch though. The German spoof ended its run today.

Vicks: What's with you and leather?? No, I don't LOVE cows, but they're very useful animals. We get milk, cheese, beef and leather from them. And yes, I like beef. Hey, I used to eat steak quite frequently. I haven't done so in a long time. And yes, those were cafe cartel ribs.

Quek: Exactly. I suppose some people don't appreciate good food, haha.

Happy Dilemmas

I watched "Dreamship Surprise: Periode 1" today. It was a hilarious, low-brow crassy spoof of Star Wars and Star Trek, plus a few other shows sneaked in here and there. The kind of show in the tradition of "Spaceballs" and its ilk. The kind you waste several dollars for a good laugh. And best of all, it was in German! ahahaha

I realised how good St. Louis Pork Ribs are today. One day I shall debone them myself, rib by rib....

After that I went window shopping around town for my Christmas presents. I face a dilemma. Should I get a watch or a wallet? I saw this nice Fossil watch which I quite liked today. Then I saw various Braun Buffel and Renoma wallet types. I like Renoma for its design. Its got the right leather texture that I like. Soft, not too smooth, and thick. Its quite classy too, and its cheaper. But of course it's a prestige thing to have a bull rampant upon black leather. And there's this really nice Braun Buffel design with a two-tone leather front. Too bad they don't have a model in majority burgundy. I like burgundy.

I think right now I'm leaning towards getting the wallet. Maybe I'll use my hongbao money and get the watch next year. I won't wear it to school anyway. It would be too precious. Maybe now and then, haha... I've decided to take a leather strap again over a metal strap. They look soo good. I think I'll get the wide strap one.


Tomorrow will be the MUN meeting to decide which country we're going to be, and I'm supposed to suggest something. I have no idea what. No particular country appeals to me now... Maybe we should be Jamaica then we can wear straw hats and slippers into the General Assembly and tell everyone in our thick Rastafarian accents, "Hey, chill maaan..."

It just came into my mind to formulate my Christmas gift list today while strolling around. I realised how good Braun Buffel wallets look, and how much I suddenly wanted a new one. hehe

I'm getting a sinking feeling in my heart that always marrs my holidays. That same feeling that tells me there's plenty of work to be done and I haven't done any of it. Well, to begin with there's that blasted INR. I've no idea how we're supposed to go about doing that. Then there's History, Econs, and upcoming Lit homework. On top of these there's my S Paper selection test to prepare for, and MUN research. I think I like putting these things down. It gives me a sense of perspective on what to do.

So, there was no Sentosa outing in the end. There's not much fun in five people running around on the beach. If I've said it once, I'll say it again: a class outing is simply priceless. Even getting four guys together takes up an awful lot of text messages. In the end it was Jeremy, Dai Wei, Musa and me trooping off to watch a movie, the results of which I will not reveal, in order to save whatever scraps of pride we still place in our, um, masculinity...

ANYWAY, I once told Quek that if you walked around Orchard long enough, you eventually meet almost everyone you know. And true enough, we met plenty of people we knew. Let me see, first I met Xin Nin at Lido. Dai Wei also spotted the boyfriend of his 1st three months classmate... Then we bumped into Liz and Kelly at Borders. umm, I think Musa saw several dancers. Then as we were entering Orchard Station Jill emerged dramatically from the crowds (it was more of the classic jump and scream-out-name-of-person tactic). There was even a confused moment when I recognised Shang, the RJ debater, on the escalator. Have I left out anyone? Hmm, nope, I don't think so.

ughh... My head hurts. I didn't exactly have a very pleasant night sleeping. The imagination produces wondrous effects when given room to flower. And so, I will probably end up snoring on my bed this afternoon.

I've been making some progress in my books. Which is of course good. At this rate I should be able to finish everything this hols, with space for maybe more. I should. This kind of talk was unheard of a few years ago. Usually I just blaze through books. But maybe its because the kind of books I'm reading now require more time to think.

Listening to Christmas songs now, haha... Feeling all Christmassy again... I think...Christmas is best experienced as a child, when the wonder of the season wasn't that commercialised, the joy of looking and picking through all those marvellously wrapped gifts clustered beneath that great old tree that seemed to get shorter with each passing year. In my case it literally got shorter. We replaced it with a shorter one a few years back.

I was remarking to my mother some time back that for a secular country, Singapore spends a great deal of money on what is supposed to be a religious holiday. Ha. What a joke.

Birthdays and PW.

Happy Birthday, Beni! So, the first part of my day was spent accompanying that little princess around. You cannot imagine how hard it is to find the right birthday card. Well, looks like I found it in the end, haha. Then later Vicks and I started drawing up fantastic birthday plans for a certain someone we know. If I say the name here the surprise would be gone. Ah, birthdays, such paradoxes. On the one hand they are important for being remembrances of the day we were born, on the other, mere irritances to get by, reminders that we're getting older, and that the world doesn't care. But I've never expected much on birthdays anyway. It's important to be thankful for the things you have, not what you don't, or want to have.

So we come to it at the last. Tomorrow will be the day for Oral Presentation, the make or break event of our PW grades. Our group gathered in Macs today for a final council before the battle begins. And for once, I was the last and latest, ha! Once tomorrow is over we can breathe a sigh of relief and write out our INRs and hand them in. Then this scourge will be ended. By next week. Thank God.

Meanwhile I must look into all the various things to be done this hols. So much to do, so much time to do them, but so little willpower. And the final factor often leads to "so much to do, so little time to do it". haha. When will I learn?

Now even my cell leader has gotten wind of this blogging business with the council. Will wonders never cease? And I thought church would be the last place to be invaded by outside gossip. Oh well, I guess I better clear it up with him before he gets the wrong idea. I am NOT in trouble because of blogging.
Really, I wonder what prayer walks are for if you spend half of it gossiping about others... (this last comment isn't about my cell leader, nor anyone from my church. it's about someone else. obviously.)

Revelation

I just chanced upon a simple revelation that I think I've always known. My brother was asking me if i was going to school tomorrow (tomorrow being Saturday), and I said yes. What he meant, of course, was if I was going to school for academic stuff. When i said yes I meant I was going to school, but for cell group. My church is in the school campus for the uninformed. So I told him, if you asked me on ANY day before school closed for the hols, if I was going to school the following day, the answer would always be yes. I enter the school campus seven days a week. Then I said, on Monday to Friday I go there for academic education. On Saturday and Sunday it's for spiritual education. I thought it sad that we spend more time on other things than spiritual education. Then it struck me. We spend only two or one days in church so that we may apply what we learn there in the other five days of the week. Monday to Friday, then, is putting into practice what we have been taught. Of course, one might say we are supposed to grow and learn spiritually everyday. Yes, that is true, but to me those days of growing are through practice, and perhaps through teaching here and there. But the days when we devote our time and energy entirely to "the things eternal", as CS Lewis wrote, are on the weekends. And they are few, so that we may pass through the things temporal with the grace given then.

***

So, after my PW was done in the morning I went out for lunch with Quek. We witnessed a spectacular pyrotechnics display in Manhattan Fish Market. That's the first time I've seen anyone flame prawns with a blowtorch. So Jeremy got to eat his award-winning flaming prawns. That plus fireworks, haha.

I realised, that for all my fascination with CS Lewis' works, I've never actually read the Chronicles of Narnia. How ironic, since most people encounter Lewis first through that portion of his writings. I've decided to get a copy of "The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe" before the movie comes out. So that's another show onto my list. Add "King Kong" to the list too. Another three-hour Peter Jackson epic coming our way, haha. I miss the yearly LOTR fests.

Liz: For the love of sanity, how many times must I tell you that I am NOT vicks' husband?? I know for a fact she doesn't like you teasing her about this, and I think you know that too. So please drop it. In any case, I'm neither inviting her nor anyone else to the party. haha. But that's for now. My plans may change.

Quek: well, like I said, my plans may change. I don't think my house can fit that many people, haha. How many years has it been since I invited you and Ker Han? three?

Ok, so here I am in school, at 10.25 in the morning, waiting for my PW group to show up. Since I have nothing to do, I shall blog. But the problem is, I have nothing to blog about... Oh well, let me answer the tags...

Liz: I said, the Christmas party is for relatives only... And yes, I know that there are hundreds of MUNs across the world. In fact, from what I now, the Harvard MUN is one of the more recognised ones. In actual fact I don't think MUN counts for much on your resume.

Quek: yeah well, but i still want more books! We must meet up soon. Preferably today, since I've got nothing to do in the afternoon...

Kevin: umm, well, what's wrong with Lian clan? I'm proud of my family name, haha. Quite a rarity... I can stand it everytime people misspell my surname. And the most common misspelling of it is "Lim". Ugh.

This is bad. I've finished answering the tags and still no Musa or Vicks. :( Maybe I should be random and just rattle off my head. Let's see, on the bus just now I saw the Harry Potter trailers again and again. The show seems exciting. So I'll add that to my list of shows to watch this hols. Wait, I don't have a list. Nevermind, it can be the first one. I hope other nicer shows pop up.

OK, Vicks just called. Going off now...

Yay! I got into MUN! So now I'm officially a delegate on the school team. I see two people out of 5 I know on the team, Manit and Anjali. That's good. It's always fun to have Manit around. Have I blogged before about how whenever I see him a smile lights my face? I know that sounded really gay, but I'm serious. He really funny. You people should meet him one day. Vicks, if you think I was deadpan in the second term, wait till you get to know Manit. He's more deadpan than I ever was, and he's certainly lost none of his deadpan-ness so far.

It was while pondering on the things I have to do this holidays when I began wondering on whether I've over commited myself. I have an S Paper selection test to prepare for, and if I make it through that means a Lit S Paper on my back. Then now there's MUN. Plus the Inter House Debates we plan to run next year, and the NUS Challenge Shields. The good thing is that most of these take place only in the first 3 months of next year. But an S Paper a seriously a heavy undertaking, so I hope I made the right choice.

I added yet another book to my CS Lewis collection today, Miracles. This means I now have a backlog of three books to clear. This is quite bad, because I'm taking a mighty long time to read the first book, which is very rare of me. Of course, I know the cause of the problem. The computer. I've been hooked to the com playing games since the start of the hols. I guess I better stop. Oh well, at least I'll have PW to do tomorrow, something profitable to occupy me for the next few days. Did I just say PW was profitable? I meant profitable in purely academic terms. ugh.

My parents raised the issue today of holding a Christmas party this year. Apparently my first uncle looks forward to it, along with a substantial part of my extended family I think. I find it funny that they should think this way, because I don't (when I say I don't, I mean I don't particularly look forward to the party. Just the food). But I guess, ever since my grandmother passed away some years ago, there haven't been many events where the whole Lian clan can gather together. My family holds a Christmas gathering yearly for our relatives, mainly on my father's side. It's actually an on-off event, as in some years we hold it, some years we don't. Last year we didn't for instance. But I think because we've been doing it for so long (my mom revealed to me today they started it when I was a baby), it's become like a family tradition. A good one to keep, I would say. I always look forward to turkey and honey baked ham. This year I'm pushing for roast beef on the menu. We've learnt not to order from NTUC. Cold Storage gives much better quality, even though the prices might be higher. Maybe we should get roasted pork ribs too. :)